I swear, I say this so often these days…you just don’t know how something feels until you experience it. Period. You can try to understand, but you just can’t…you need to live it and breathe it to totally get it. Even then, your experience is different then the next person, but you have a better perspective on how it truly FEELS.

My daughter not only celebrated a birthday this last weekend, but she also moved into her official first place. They found the cutest house to rent and they are all gleaming (the dog too) with pride in their new digs. As her Mom, I am elated with joy and so very excited for this stage in her life…and mine too.

It’s weird, I think we refer to empty nesting when our kids leave for college but that isn’t really it. That just prepares you for the big leave. My daughter has moved out two times previously – one time locally to attend our local junior college and then out of state to finish college (she lived in a dorm and apartment there). So, yes, she has ‘moved out’ before, but this is the BIG one. This is the ‘she’s not coming back’ move. And crazy enough, I’m OK with it.

I truly took a day for myself on Sunday. My body AND mind needed it. I was upset that I couldn’t just blow through my place and get it spic and span, I have temporary physical limitations right now. Instead, I focused on what I COULD do. I would go from room to room and tidy/cook/rest. I made a little game out of it. When I rested, I was either writing or just thinking. I wasn’t sad for my girl moving out, I had this overwhelming feeling of peace and happiness. This is what SHE wanted and this is what happens in this phase of life. I had a bit of guilt for feeling so free and not feeling sad. It’s the oddest feeling…it’s like I made it to the finish line and have this incredible sense of pride and joy for my child. Will I miss not seeing her as often, 100%, but that just makes the time we will spend together that much more special. Bring on new memories!

Some of you want your kiddos to never leave and I’m not judging anyone here. I’m just giving a little perspective. I recently had this realization that my #1 and job I’m most proud of for the last 23 years is MOM. I have given my blood, sweat and tears to try and be the best Mom and role model I could be. Am I perfect, far from it…but I wear that badge with pride. It’s now MY turn. It’s my turn to put ME first. My children have and will always be my number one, but I need to teach myself how to put me first, and not feel bad about it. This is a beautiful stage in life. It’s the time to sit back and watch all of the fruits of your labor truly LIVE their best life.

Last October, I posted a Blog entitled Flying (you can read it HERE). As I started typing this blog I thought, I swear I’ve written about this. As I re-read that blog, I still feel the same…but different. I absolutely LOVE watching my kids’ in this phase of life. They are figuring things out and although at times I’d like to insert my commentary, I’m really trying to LET THEM (Thank you Mel Robbins). Her book ‘Let Them’ has really given me more enlightenment to let them do what they need and want to do. There are no failures in life, only lessons.

My son has been out of town and it’s been weird coming home to a completely empty place – no extra mouths to feed, no dog, very little mess to clean…it’s just weird. Although my son comes home soon, and I cannot wait to give him a big ole hug! He will be taking off soon to college and I feel confident that I have given both of my kiddos all the tools to live a peaceful, happy and abundant life. I’ve done my job. Will I ever stop being their Mom and do Mom things – heck no…but I’m going to embrace this friendship phase with them. They are pretty dang awesome human beings and I know they are destined for great things, things that truly make their hearts happy. And, I’m going to embrace ME. I’m not afraid to get older, I’m not afraid of what the future holds, I’m damn excited! I feel very free. Life is what you make it and I’m intrigued about this chapter in my life and I’m not going to apologize for it!

And then, poof, as I’m finishing this blog, I get a little dose of complete validation of my feelings. I got a facetime call from my daughter giving me a tour of what she’s done with the place since the weekend. She had a smile plastered on her face the entire time. There it is, joy all over again. Big changes that I’m embracing. It’s interesting when you have this vision of where you think you’d be at this phase of your life – this wasn’t what I envisioned. However, I couldn’t imagine anything different. I’m letting life unfold, focusing on me and watching my kiddos soar and it’s truly beautiful.

Hey Parents – I’m giving you permission to feel whatever feelings you have and be proud of where your kids are, at whatever stage. Support them, love them…but let them be too. There is so much power in allowing them to figure things out on their own, and it’s magical to experience. Go get yourself some flowers to brighten up a room in your place. As always, thank you for being on this journey with me – together we can make a difference. Cheers!

Do you believe in the power of prayer? I’ve learned through the years that there are many different ways to believe in something higher than yourself. I personally believe in God, but know not everyone does. I’m not here to judge, preach or convert anyone – just looking for some extra good vibes, positive energy, prayers…whatever that looks like for you.

I don’t know about you, but this has been the longest year, and it’s just the beginning of March. I know WAY too many people that are just going through it – you name it, and I know someone going through it. If you have it in you, I would appreciate HUGE prayers for everyone I know. I typically don’t have specific prayers for things I ‘want’. My typical nightly prayer is to pray for good health for my family and friends and to serve up for me what is for my highest and best good. The remainder of my prayer is simply gratitude, as I am incredibly grateful. As I was just reminder by my neighbor last week, if you woke up today, it’s a good day!

In turn, should YOU be in need of some additional prayers or good thoughts your way, please shoot me a message and I will add you to my prayers. I’m a firm believer in the power of prayer and positive energy. I just finished such a powerful book that I’ve talked about before – The Secret to Love Health & Money. It is basically the law of attraction…our thoughts become our reality. For instance, you don’t want to say ‘please don’t let me get sick’, you are then putting sickness in the universe. Instead, say ‘please help me to stay in good strong health’. You see the difference? Create space for that positive energy for you and those around you.

In writing this post, I have some additional gratitude and that is to a dear friend of mine that truly re-introduced me to prayer. She is proof of strong belief and prayer. Her and her husband recently started a new business and I can’t help but think that the big man upstairs played and continues to play a major role in their journey. I might as well give her a shoutout, as they are doing BIG things. Their business is called Special Strong. I encourage you to check them out – such a positive impact on the community and so many lives! Thank you to my friend for her beautiful presence in my life and for being there for me in BIG ways on this wild journey of life.

As always, I so appreciate you being with me in my journey AND I very much appreciate you sharing your journey with me – we can all get through this life together by sharing our stories of hope and strength. This post is about believing in something bigger than ourselves. I have had many powerful spiritual moments in my life and thank you in advance for holding my family and friends in your prayers and good thoughts. It truly takes a village and a community to live an abundant life and I’m grateful for mine. Please don’t forget to buy yourself flowers or remind those around you that you deserve beautiful flowers. I have been looking at these happy flowers I received last week – flowers have a way of just making you smile. Cheers to a magical week!

Do you have good friends? Are you a good friend? I mean, do you ever ask yourself this question? What does friendship mean to you? Let’s chat about it…

So, if you keep up with my blog, you will know that I’ve had some rough patches in my life…more over the last 5 years than I care to think about. Recently, I was really struggling and I had a knock on my door after my one friend found out what I was going through. It was her son, as she lives far away, he was dropping off Panera to me – salad, soup and cookies. He asked if he could give me a hug and said ‘I hope that what you are going through gets better’. Well, I thought I was getting a hold of my emotions but nope…that sent me right over the edge again. It immediately made me want to ‘up’ my friend game. I told my friend that I truly strive to be a friend like her. She is truly one of the most thoughtful and beautiful humans I know. We can all take a page out of her book. AND, can I please acknowledge what an amazing human she raised…I mean Wow!

Taking my recent situation to a different level…I was very quiet and shut everyone out the first handful of days. I was really trying to process what I was going through. I didn’t want to be greeted that next week with ‘how was your amazing long weekend with your boyfriend’ comments, so I decided to head it off at the pass. I did reach out and let a handful of close friends know what was going on, I was very brief and just said that I wasn’t ready to talk about it. EVERY SINGLE ONE of them replied with they love me and are there for me when I’m ready. BEST RESPONSE EVER! No prying, just respecting my wishes. THIS is true friendship.

I’m extremely fortunate to have a group of friends that have been in my life since junior high/high school days – we are talking over 35 years of memories, laughter, tears, births, deaths, divorce and love…SO much love! We don’t talk every day, but I tell you what, if one of us needed something we would rush to their side. We try our best to at least plan an annual trip. I’d do anything for these girls! Fun fact, I went to kindergarten with one of these friends and we were reunited again in junior high – lucky me.

These weren’t my only friends from high school I keep in contact with, I have some other great friends that I still connect with once and a while – definitely wish it was more often. I was lucky to have gone from elementary all the way through high school with quite a few people too. Facebook is good for some things and I love watching their lives unfold. I have an overwhelming amount of cherished memories with so many beautiful people – I’m a lucky girl.

Then there are those friends that you’ve met in the workplace. Shoot, we are at work more than we are at home and I’ve made some solid friendships at work. All of my friends went away to college. I tried that for a little less than a year and got into the workforce. I’ve been working a fulltime job since I was 19. I’ve had some awesome co-workers through the years and really fond memories. I’m grateful for those relationships and all the wisdom shared over the years. Two of my dearest friends are my co-workers and I couldn’t imagine going through the last 10 plus years without them by my side.

You also have your ‘Mom’ friends or the friends you’ve met along the way through your kids. These are special kind of friendships. Even if our kids don’t stay in contact, us Mom’s have a special bond. We shared so much of our lives together at school functions, Brownie’s, soccer practice, carpools, coffee dates, etc. We were in the throws of parenthood together and I don’t think I would have come out of it the same without those relationships. Shoot, one of my closest friends is my daughter’s ex-boyfriend’s Mom (Yep, you read that right). We got each other in their break-up and I’m so very grateful.

Lastly, you have your family that have turned into friends and vice versa. You know, the older you get, your Mom will still be your Mom, but she will also be one of your best friends too. Your family can definitely be part of your friendship circle (or not) – you get to make this choice. There are those special kind of friends that have been around so long, they are like family. I have a friend that I’ve known since high school that will spend the holidays with us from time to time and it makes my heart so happy – she is a beautiful friend, yet also like family.

So, I will ask the question again – are you a good friend? Are you the type of friend that YOU would want to be friends with? It’s OK if you are lacking a bit in this department, I’m not here to judge…just to remind you about what I think is important in life. I’m truly blessed to have met some really cool people in my lifetime and I don’t take those friendships for granted. 100%, I would not be where I am today with my friends! I’d say one of the biggest bummers is that there just isn’t enough time to see everyone I want to see as often as I’d like to see them. Let’s make a pact to just strive to be better – better to ourselves and those around us. Nourish the relationships in your life, water those gardens and definitely don’t take them for granted. Go buy yourself some flowers and smile. It’s a good day to have a good day!

I’ve been dished even more perspective over the last two weeks. Injuries suck! My words of the year are LISTEN & PERSPECTIVE. So far, my words are quite appropriate!

It’s interesting how life works. There is something to be said for the saying ‘You have no idea until you walk a mile in my shoes’. We can try to understand others’ situations, but you truly never know how something feels until you have a personal experience. We can empathize and offer support to others, but we never 100% know how someone else feels. However, we don’t really need to try…we just need to show up, acknowledge and be there.

I had a short conversation with my daughter last week, as she tore her ACL a little over a year ago. It only took me a year, but I understood her frustration and emotion of her situation so much more. I felt compelled to acknowledge the struggle she went through over the last year, for so may reasons. I have obviously expressed how awful I felt for her along her recovery journey, but for the first time, I feel like she truly felt acknowledged and heard. Sometimes I think that is what we need…a little acknowledgement of the ‘suck factor’. Sometimes what life throws at you just sucks and it feels good for someone to see and hear you. Show up for you.

Do you Show up? This is a two-part question. First of all…do you show up for YOU? Do you make promises to yourself (I will wake up earlier, I will eat healthier, I will make better financial decisions…you get the idea) and not keep them? Then you need to start showing up for yourself. Why don’t we treat ourselves as we treat others? I personally think it’s easier to show up for others than ourselves. Do you show up consistently? If so, ROCK ON – you are awesome! If you are struggling with getting started in a routine and/or just being consistent…Well, this is your reminder to SHOW UP FOR YOU!! You are worth it. You deserve to go after what you want and consistently show up for yourself, no matter how you are feeling. I’m not only reminding you – I’m reminding ME too.

The other part of this question is…do you show up for those you care about? Do you make the extra effort to make those that are in your village feel acknowledged and heard? First of all, you need to show up for YOU. You know the saying ‘You can’t pour from an empty cup’. Then, you need to show up for others. Give attention to those you care about, just show up! I’ve experienced this multiple times in my life now…my back surgery and my divorce were probably my biggest teachers. Sometimes I asked for help and sometimes I didn’t, but there were people that just showed up – checked in on me, acknowledged the ‘suck factor’ of what I was going through. I will never forget these people and how they made me feel. So please, send a note to someone to let them know you are there for them, call them, show up at their doorstep – Just SHOW UP! Be the kind of person that you want in your own corner.

Can we make a pact together and put more effort into Showing Up. Go after those big dreams and show up for yourself every dang day…especially those days that are extra tough. Those days you don’t want to wake up to your alarm or walk that extra mile – read that quote above a second time. Stay the course and SHOW UP!

Don’t forget to buy yourself flowers. It’s also Valentine’s week – perhaps buy someone else flowers too. Be well!