I’ve been dished even more perspective over the last two weeks. Injuries suck! My words of the year are LISTEN & PERSPECTIVE. So far, my words are quite appropriate!
It’s interesting how life works. There is something to be said for the saying ‘You have no idea until you walk a mile in my shoes’. We can try to understand others’ situations, but you truly never know how something feels until you have a personal experience. We can empathize and offer support to others, but we never 100% know how someone else feels. However, we don’t really need to try…we just need to show up, acknowledge and be there.
I had a short conversation with my daughter last week, as she tore her ACL a little over a year ago. It only took me a year, but I understood her frustration and emotion of her situation so much more. I felt compelled to acknowledge the struggle she went through over the last year, for so may reasons. I have obviously expressed how awful I felt for her along her recovery journey, but for the first time, I feel like she truly felt acknowledged and heard. Sometimes I think that is what we need…a little acknowledgement of the ‘suck factor’. Sometimes what life throws at you just sucks and it feels good for someone to see and hear you. Show up for you.
Do you Show up? This is a two-part question. First of all…do you show up for YOU? Do you make promises to yourself (I will wake up earlier, I will eat healthier, I will make better financial decisions…you get the idea) and not keep them? Then you need to start showing up for yourself. Why don’t we treat ourselves as we treat others? I personally think it’s easier to show up for others than ourselves. Do you show up consistently? If so, ROCK ON – you are awesome! If you are struggling with getting started in a routine and/or just being consistent…Well, this is your reminder to SHOW UP FOR YOU!! You are worth it. You deserve to go after what you want and consistently show up for yourself, no matter how you are feeling. I’m not only reminding you – I’m reminding ME too.
The other part of this question is…do you show up for those you care about? Do you make the extra effort to make those that are in your village feel acknowledged and heard? First of all, you need to show up for YOU. You know the saying ‘You can’t pour from an empty cup’. Then, you need to show up for others. Give attention to those you care about, just show up! I’ve experienced this multiple times in my life now…my back surgery and my divorce were probably my biggest teachers. Sometimes I asked for help and sometimes I didn’t, but there were people that just showed up – checked in on me, acknowledged the ‘suck factor’ of what I was going through. I will never forget these people and how they made me feel. So please, send a note to someone to let them know you are there for them, call them, show up at their doorstep – Just SHOW UP! Be the kind of person that you want in your own corner.
Can we make a pact together and put more effort into Showing Up. Go after those big dreams and show up for yourself every dang day…especially those days that are extra tough. Those days you don’t want to wake up to your alarm or walk that extra mile – read that quote above a second time. Stay the course and SHOW UP!
Don’t forget to buy yourself flowers. It’s also Valentine’s week – perhaps buy someone else flowers too. Be well!
2+0+2+5 = 9, which means this is a 9 year. Yes, I believe in signs, the Universe, God…ALL the things! The more I read and fill my mind with positivity, gratitude and love, the more powerful I feel. What we feed our mind is so incredibly important. As with most of my posts, this is a reminder to dive into YOU and love YOU a little more this year. I’m not saying to not nurture your relationships, don’t overthink what I’m saying. I’m saying to make more time for you and make yourself a priority. You truly can’t pour from an empty cup – permission to FILL YOUR CUP!
First off, I want to give credit where credit is due. The images you see here entitled ‘2025’ are from Mia French’s IG page. Give her a follow and check out her website too – insightful! Give yourself a few minutes in a quiet space to truly embrace what you are about to read. THIS is some powerful stuff!
I mean, you can read and I’m not going to reiterate every word here but WOW – just WOW! Whatever it is you want/need to release – a habit, a grudge, old relationship, this could be anything – it’s time to LET IT GO! Releasing and surrendering to 100% create space for our true potential to emerge! Bye Bye Fear…Hello Authenticity! It is time to unapologetically live your true authentic life!
Every word of this – SO powerful. YES YES and YES! My question to you is, are you willing to let go of what no longer serves you and create that space for powerful journeys ahead?
Pride in who we ‘were’ – think about that one. We beat ourselves up over possible ‘mistakes’ or ‘wrong paths’ from our past. Have pride in your journey, no matter how rough the road. You are HERE and still standing. In fact, your journey has helped mold you into the person you are today. As stated above…’Cultivate gratitude for the lessons we’ve learned along the way’. It all comes back to gratitude baby!
‘…giving and receiving with an open heart.’ LOVE this! As much as we give to others, we need to be open to receive the gifts the Universe has to offer.
YES! Create that space for the magic and miracles that await AND a beautiful reminder that YOU ARE ALWAYS ENOUGH!
I hope you took the time to truly read and hear the words spoken – Wowzer! I literally have all of these up on my board in my room and read them every week. Such amazing reminders of what this magical year has in store for us…IF you are open to receive. Multiple times we are reminded to trust in divine timing or your divine path. Listen to the signs around you and don’t fight the flow. When we choose to not listen, we are going against our divine path – just sayin!
Dive into yourself this year – embrace transformation, embrace meaningful endings and beautiful beginnings and EVERYTHING in between. May you never feel alone on this magical journey called life. May you look at your past with appreciation for where you are today and to your future with confidence and hope. Permission to buy yourself flowers. Much love!
I want to take you back in time for a minute. For some of you, you will have to use your imagination, as you didn’t have the pleasure of growing up in the 80’s/90’s. This was our form of texting and I want to bring it back!
Who didn’t love getting a note passed to them in Jr. High or High School? The anticipation, the response, all the feelings that go into both writing and receiving a note/letter. At one point in high school, I had a small group of girlfriends, I think there was 3 of us and we had a straight-up screenplay going on. One would write and then the next person would pick-up where they left off and so on. I’m not kidding. We had a cast of characters (of course, we were the main stars) and scenarios playing out – it was like real live 90210 episodes. If any of you girls are reading this, I will still never tell what we spoke of. Ha! Gosh, I wish I could find these – what gems! We wrote our deepest darkest thoughts in some of these notes. Those truly were the days!
I had a good friend in high school that was a grade older than me and he went off to the military after high school. I enjoyed sending him letters and packages with treats in them, as I know he liked receiving them. One day he either called or wrote me and said to please not put anything but his name and address on the packages, as he had to do push-up’s for every LETTER that wasn’t supposed to be on there. Oopsy! I may or may not have done just one more with extra letters to be funny. I honestly can’t remember, but that would be something I would do – funny not funny. My very late apologies if that is what I did.
I mean, when has a letter or sending notes back and forth ever gone wrong? (insert slight sarcasm here) Well, a text can sure go wrong too, but you can put so much more thought into a note/letter. I know I entitled this ‘Love Letters’, but it’s not just love letters…it’s letters of friendship, it’s letters to let someone know you are thinking of them, it’s doing something different to bring someone else in your life joy, it’s a pleasant surprise…and for goodness sake, it’s stepping away from your phone for a moment and what a great way to spend that time.
Quiz time: Do you know what movie this note is from above? Well, if you don’t, I’m sorry for you. Also, just google Jake Ryan and watch that movie. No person should go through life without seeing that movie.
Let’s give this a shot guys! I put on my weekly challenge board to send ONE letter per week and my first one just went out. That is $.73 for a stamp and you can use a piece of printer paper, binder paper…or whatever you think your recipient might like. Perhaps it’s Strawberry Shortcake stationary. My point, it will cost a little bit of your time and $.73 to make someone smile and I guarantee you will smile as you are writing it. It doesn’t have to be elaborate, just let someone know you are thinking of them. Put the shoe on the other foot, how nice is it to get something in the mail that isn’t junk, a bill or Publisher’s Clearing House (does that still exist?).
I’d like to take more time this year to slow down, get off my phone and truly focus on what matters in life. TIME! It’s something we don’t get back, so let’s make the best use of it. Shoot, start your own screenplay – I double dog dare you, how fun! One thing our children are robbed of is waiting…the anticipation of waiting for a response. With texting or email, it is almost immediate. Imagine starting off a screenplay with your friends and sending it to one of them, or better yet, the same note to all of them and wait for a response. Hmmm…I just might do this myself. Have fun with it, but try it…just once. I’m challenging you to send ONE letter to a friend or loved one.
A good letter is a little bit of magic.
As always, take time for YOU, whatever that looks like. You are never alone in your journey and that is the space I want to continue to create. Hey, if you want to up my thoughts on buying yourself flowers…randomly send someone flowers, just because (that up’s the game a bit). Go pick a flower or two for yourself and smile at yourself in the mirror. You are on this earth for a reason and the world is a better place with you in it!
Lastly, if you are enjoying my blog, please share it with others and don’t forget to subscribe. Cheers!
Yep, the strong one completely crumbled. Remember when I said healing isn’t linear, well, I’m living proof of that. So, let me preface this post by saying…please read until the end. I debated on posting this multiple times, but again, the purpose of this blog is to be real, raw and honest with the hopes of helping others not feel alone. Feeling alone is a real crappy feeling…and I just had that awful alone feeling again, its been a while.
I’m not looking for sympathy or I’m sorry. Please don’t feel bad for me. I’m blessed and grateful…and I’m human. I felt awful just a handful of days ago and looking back at the things I wrote and said, I don’t recognize that person. You know when you say to someone, ‘I’m so sorry, I can’t imagine how you feel’. There is so much truth to that, you truly don’t know what something feels like until you experience it. I felt gut punched on Christmas Day and I felt so much hurt not only for myself but for others. Then I started going down a rabbit hole of sadness. I say that I don’t have depression, but that has to have been what that was. I was sad for my situation and then I started feeling guilty for feeling sad and mad at myself for not having more empathy for those that have lost loved ones, those that are spending Christmas alone, those that can’t afford the Christmas they want…the list goes on, and so did my tears. I was in deep.
So, here goes…a few days leading up to Christmas my daughter moved home (happy Mom heart) and we had a fun day together. Presents were wrapped, baking was done and all was good. I knew my ex was coming into town and kept telling myself I was fine. The last thing I wanted was to run into him in my small town. I still have quite a bit of anger toward that man. I’m a work in progress, and working on releasing that (Yes, I’m making a therapy appointment). So, flash forward to Christmas Eve and my kids, my daughter’s boyfriend and I all headed to my brothers for a beautiful celebration. Surrounded by so much family, friends, love…and food. Gosh, the food was amazing. It was truly a great night (although I was really bummed my Mom, Dad and boyfriend weren’t there).
My niece really outdid herself with this beautiful spread
The kids and I get home and we decided to open presents at midnight on Christmas Eve. I thought, what a fun new tradition. We played games, laughed and made it to about 11:45 and opened our presents. My heart was so full. We woke up (very early – it’s payback time) to be with my cousin and his sweet family on Christmas morning. So fun to be around little ones on Christmas – makes it a little more magical. When we all got back home, we were pooped and all took naps. My kids were heading to celebrate with their Dad and his family in the afternoon (where I have celebrated every Christmas for the last 23 years). I literally thought I was fine and as soon as the door shut, I burst into tears. Like ugly, uncontrollable tears. It was kind of like being on a super high and knocked down to a super low, like the rug being pulled out from under you.
I proceeded to stay in bed from 1 PM (when they left) until the evening, when I got out of bed to say Hi when they got home, made a little plate of food and went right back to bed. I was drowning in my own sorrows. I wasn’t ‘fine’. I wouldn’t respond to text messages, I was my own worst enemy. I woke up the next morning and took Christmas down immediately (pretty sure that was the first time ever I took Christmas down so early). I couldn’t stop crying, I was a mess. Every time I thought it was my turn to hang out with my kids, they were off to hang out with him. Whether this was perception or reality, it was my reality and it was cutting me deep.
I was my own worst enemy.
I cried myself to sleep AGAIN and woke up in the morning and thought that I needed to do something for me and stop waiting for others to ask me to do something. I showered, packed a lunch (I made the yummiest sandwich) and just started driving. I was first led to the airport and sat in the waiting area and ate part of my sandwich in the car. Still tears at any given moment. I thought, what could I do that is completely mindless where I don’t think about anything. My first thought was honey walnut prawns at Cache Creek Casino. I hadn’t been there in over 10 years. The rain started to clear and the sky was beautiful by the time I got there. I chatted with the little old ladies at the machines, won some money (I was on a lucky streak) and got my fried rice and shrimp.
When I got home, I was still in a bit of a funk. I chatted with my boyfriend (so grateful for him) and decided to pack and go see him the next morning. I did exactly that. I texted my kids that I was leaving and wasn’t sure when I was coming back (that I have since apologized for profusely – what a terrible text). No excuses, but I’ve read that text multiple times and truly don’t recognize that person. I was ready to talk and had a great chat with my boyfriend and the veil started to lift. I was being dished perspective left and right over those last handful of days. I was choosing to drown in my tears. What was I so upset about?
I kept asking myself – why does the person that treated me so poorly get all the attention? Why does everything get dropped when he comes to town? Why does everyone just forget about what he’s done to me? It’s MY holiday week too and I don’t get to hang with my kids. In retrospect, it doesn’t matter what HE gets, or how others choose to treat him, it’s not about HIM…its about my kids. I want the world for my kids and I want them to be happy, I was making it worse.
Here is where my gratitude lies, I was able to pull myself out. I know that is NOT easy for some and you aren’t alone. I have a saying that you can have a bad day or two, you just can’t stay there. Perhaps write down the things that can help pull you out, then you can refer to it when you are feeling down again. It will happen, not all days are good days. It’s what we do with those bad days that gives us more tools…more power. Please, PLEASE, if you are struggling, as now I know firsthand how hard the holidays especially can be – reach out to someone…anyone! Write about it, voice clip about it (this is powerful to hear the tone in your voice later), please do what works for you but remember YOU need to do SOMETHING. No one can pull you out but YOU!
Lastly, perspective! You are here, you woke up this morning – that is reason enough to keep pushing and to keep fighting for the life you want. Ironically, on Christmas morning, we were driving and the sky on one side was completely dreary and grey and the picture below is what the other side of the sky looked like. SO gorgeous. It’s all in the way you look at things, what lens do you want to see things? I was CHOOSING the grey, when there was so much beauty right in front of me – SO much to be grateful for. We need to CHOOSE BEAUTY!
A few things…again, please reach out to someone if you are feeling alone and in a dark space. My heart goes out to those of you that struggle during the holidays, you aren’t alone. I LOVED looking at all of the pictures of my family and friends celebrating, please don’t feel bad for having a beautiful holiday…however, I ask that you move forward with empathy toward others – perspective. I will be reaching out to others more myself. A reminder that you can have a bad day, please don’t stay there. AND, who cares how other people treat someone that has wronged you…that’s their story, not yours. Permission to buy yourself flowers and permission to do something JUST FOR YOU – YOU MATTER! By the way, this book I’m reading ‘The Secret to Love, Health, and Money’ is a powerful one. Excited to finish and move on to ‘Let Them’ by Mel Robbins. 2025 is going to be amazing – claim it! Much love!
I am getting constant validation that THIS IS SO RIGHT. Creating this safe place, talking about our journeys, our successes, our failures…it’s truly beautiful and so dang inspiring. I have so many conversations with friends, family and even strangers and there is such a common theme that I feel I need to keep repeating…LOVE YOURSELF…ALL OF YOU! Even the messy stuff, even your past or possibly your present that may be tough.
Love yourself enough to take your power back! You can’t continue to blame others for the way they treated you or for your crappy childhood or for things that didn’t turn out the way you wanted. Yes, I’m talking to myself too. If you are blaming someone else for treating you crappy, take a look in the mirror. WHY are YOU allowing them to do this? Why do you allow anyone to have that kind of power over you? Did someone wrong you? That is their cross to bear, not yours. Have you had a rough upbringing? You were a child, please don’t blame yourself and don’t repeat the behavior. Please envision that person or child you were and give them some extra love. It all circles back to LOVE. Break your cycle, you are in the drivers seat. No more blaming your past or circumstances – change your future. You deserve to be the absolute best version of yourself!
Thank you to my beautiful friend for sharing this with me. This blog isn’t just for women…please use her/him interchangeably. Let’s crush 2025 together!
At the end of the day (and even when you wake up) PLEASE, look yourself in the mirror and tell yourself what a badass you are! Tell yourself how very proud you are of yourself for pushing through barriers and pushing forward…and believe it! I was talking to some friends and had the realization that I’ve been through things (and so have most of you) that would break others. PLEASE DON’T GIVE UP ON YOU! You have a purpose in this life, go find it. Go on a quest for inner peace. The grace and forgiveness that you give to others – permission to give yourself that same gift. YOU ARE A GIFT!
Ahhh, that quote. Read it over and over until it sinks in. Shift your mindset, and watch your life change. Let’s continue to heal together. Thank YOU for sharing your thoughts and journeys with me – I am SO incredibly inspired! I am working hard to get my merchandise up and my menu posted today. Life is as beautiful as YOU make it guys – go have a beautiful week. Permission to buy yourself flowers!
Thank you to my boyfriend for the beautiful flowers!
Two new recommendations…Elton John radio is SO good. Hall & Oates, John Lennon, Journey – just take my word for it. I also cracked open a new book (I added it to ‘Currently Reading’). I needed a change from those Housemaid books, although very good, I needed something good for my soul. We started reading excerpts on our drive to Oregon last week and wow – powerful stuff. Be careful how you talk to the universe.
I’ve been trying to post blogs with somewhat of a topic of ‘Heal Cook Love’ and in that order. This one really falls into all of the above.
When the stars align, my son doesn’t work and I’m in town – my son and I get to have Football Sunday. It’s truly become one of my favorite things this last year. We watch Red Zone pretty much all day, chat and I make all sorts of yummy food throughout the day. This last Sunday was extra special to my Mama Heart. I absolutely loved our conversation throughout the day – we truly talked about EVERYTHING under the sun. And I mean everything. My biggest take away was that he expressed he is the happiest he’s ever been. Boom – my heart instantly exploded. That’s all I ever want for my children…for them to find and savor their own happiness. Not MY definition of what I think might make them happy, but their very own form of happiness. Of course, you pray they are safe, find the career they align with, a home, etc., but above all, just happiness. It’s so important to know what that feels like. This boy sure has a special place in my heart!
I made some yummy food throughout the day. I don’t typically make the same things for each of us. I typically make us a little menu for the day and cook on/off all day – I love it! For breakfast, I made him some French Toast and his favorite protein muffins. Do you ever make these? I use butterscotch chips as my ‘stir in’.
I made him a steak sandwich (thank you leftovers) and made myself this tasty little protein bowl for lunch. Cottage cheese, rotisserie chicken, apples and Dill Pickle Dip Mix (I use this stuff all the time – SO good!). This was really flavorful, something great to prep for weekday lunches. You can get your own pickle dip mix HERE.
Pizza was for dinner. We love doing pizza at home…so does my wallet! Costco and Sam’s have these packs, (Boboli or other brands), they are a great price and they come with the pizza sauce. I sold one when I was there – ha! He’s a pepperoni guy and I love a good veggie or Canadian bacon and pineapple. Who doesn’t love pizza!
Truly such an awesome day and what a cool kid. Not that I didn’t already know what a great guy he is, but don’t you have moments with your children (in all phases of their life) when you just fall in love with them all over again? I can’t quite find the right words to explain it – it’s like the definition of pure joy. I’ve really tried to just say YES in these later years…wish I would have learned this sooner. The work will always be there, you can call people back and the laundry isn’t going anywhere. If your kids want you to go on a walk, go play a game with you, play a video game, watch a movie…you get the idea – DO IT! I promise you won’t regret it. Collect those moments!
If you look up Pure Joy in the dictionary
It’s moments like last Sunday when you truly gain a deeper understanding of happiness and gratitude. I brought this amazing human into this world and I couldn’t be more proud. It’s an overwhelming emotional feeling. For all those times you’ve wanted to wring your kids’ neck (don’t go crazy, I’ve never strangled my kids), know that having adult conversations with your adult children is so dang awesome! Listen to them, you might learn something. It’s been a wild year of change and adjustment, but most of all PEACE. You can’t put a price tag on that!
As always, if you haven’t picked or bought yourself flowers this week – permission to treat yourself to some flowers. Thanks for being here in this space with me. Oh, and don’t judge…but GO CLEVELAND BROWNS!
I’m at a phase in my life where complete Empty Nesting is extremely close. I have one graduating college in December and moving home for a handful of months before moving into her own place. My other is leaving next year to a 4-year to finish college. For those of you with littles, it’s true what they say – Don’t Blink!
If you would have asked me 10 years ago, this isn’t where I thought I would be at this stage of my life…although please don’t mistake my statement for a complaint. I have zero regrets for the decisions I’ve made and I wouldn’t change a thing. In fact, I feel like I’m in a much better place than I would have been had I stayed the same course with my marriage. I feel the same about my children – I’m not speaking for them, this is just my take on the situation. I’m often asked, do you wish you would have left sooner, etc….nope, I wouldn’t change a thing. I think everything happened in the exact timing it was supposed to. I look at my kids and see how they are soaring into adulthood and I continue to find my validation. They are absolutely amazing human beings that I am so proud of. I’m not saying they are perfect, none of us are, but they are just good people with a strong work ethic and pure hearts. And in some regards, the teacher, has become the student – I learn from them every day.
Taking my daughter to school last year was very emotional, even more so knowing what I was coming home to (I will save that story for my book). Let’s just say I was under an enormous amount of stress. My daughter and I are very close and of course I cried when we said our final goodbyes and I boarded my plane to come home. I remember being sad that she wasn’t coming back with me, but also told a friend that I didn’t totally get how incredibly sad some parents get. I was super excited for her. You get to watch your grown up child go after what they want. My overwhelming feeling of happiness and excitement for her, far outweighed being sad not seeing her every day. I’m not throwing stones or judging here, this is just my experience.
Look, my opinion may not be the popular one…just trying to offer some perspective. I think that parents tend to get way too involved in their children’s lives. We need to let them fly and make ‘mistakes’ (or as I like to refer to them as lessons). If we, as parents, continue to guide and protect them from what we feel may be the wrong decision, what will happen when they DO have to face the real world and face adversity? If we keep navigating their life for them, we haven’t equipped them with those tools…we’ve robbed them of that. Do you remember how many times YOU fell on your face in your teens and 20’s? I remember a call not too long ago with my daughter and she said ‘Mom, I don’t need you, I just want you’…my heart completely melted. THAT is what we are after here. We don’t want our children to need us, at least I don’t. I want them to be strong and independent individuals, but I sure want them to WANT me in their lives and involved in their beautiful journey. Something to ponder…what if in these years we poured into ourselves as much as we have poured into our children?
I’m personally loving this phase of my kids’ life AND mine. We ALL need to be flying more…spreading our wings on a quest for what is for our highest and best good. Give an opinion, IF they ask, but gosh – let them go. I’m not saying I don’t miss my children being around more often, but there is something so incredibly magical about watching them find their way through life. Our job is to raise them, give them good values and be good people, the rest is up to them. Rest assured they will call for your opinion, money, a good cry…the list goes on, and that is when we listen to them and support them the best we can. Please don’t try and live through them or compare experiences (I catch myself with this one…’when I was starving and trying to support myself…blah, blah blah’). Hey, I’m a work in progress too and currently living through this experience. I’m far from perfect but can confidently say that I’m a dang good Mom and have given my kids’ some great tools to go make their mark on this world. I’m sure you are a good parent too, you just don’t give yourself enough credit. I believe the vast majority of us do the best we can with the tools we have…and when you know better, DO BETTER.
How fitting! In honor of it almost being Halloween and talking about my babies flying…here they are. I remember this like it was yesterday. Fly my sweet kiddos…FLY!
I would like to leave you with this thought: Please do NOT beat yourself up about coulda, shoulda, woulda…make the best of whatever phase you are in RIGHT now. You can’t go back in time and do things different, if you want to change the way you are doing things, then change the way you are doing things. Are you in a crying baby, no sleep phase…this too shall pass and your baby will be running around in no time NOT wanting you to pick them up. Are you in crazy school, sport, activity mode…I promise you will miss the crazy. Savor it, lean into it and make it fun. So many phases in life, whether you have children or not. Above all, for goodness sake PUT YOUR PHONES DOWN and spend time with the ones you love, play games, go on walks…cherish the time you have together. It truly goes by so fast.
You’re gonna miss this. You’re gonna want this back. You’re gonna wish these days hadn’t gone by so fast. ~Lyrics by Trace Adkins
Perhaps I will revisit this topic when both of my children have completely moved out. I’m not there yet and savoring as much of this time with my son as I can. Have a beautiful week. Need menu/recipe ideas? I just posted my menu for the week HERE. Want more ideas, just shoot me a message. I really love all of the messages and comments you all send. Permission to buy yourself flowers and be kind to yourself.
I was recently listening to my favorite podcaster Mel Robbins. If you aren’t already listening, check her out, she covers some great topics. She had an Asian American woman on the show that was talking about how, in her culture, she had never really heard the words ‘I Love You’ from her parents. She said that was typical of her culture. There is clearly much more to the podcast and it was a great episode (I won’t ruin it), but I couldn’t help but wonder how can you not tell your children you love them. Then it dawned on me, I’m sure they never heard it either. Perspective! We are products of our environment, we only know what we know. As humans, we need love – to love and accept ourselves AND to be and feel loved. On my journey, I have definitely had to learn to love myself. Expressing love for yourself and others isn’t easy, but it is worth it.
I’m currently reading Conversations with God and I keep re-reading parts because they are just so powerful. This one is worth sharing…
All human actions are motivated at their deepest level by one of two emotions – fear or love. In truth there are only two emotions – only two words in the language of the soul.
~Neale Donald Walsch (Conversations with God – book 1)
This couldn’t be more true. Think about it, I mean REALLY think about it. I have lived a good chunk of my life in fear. I had fear surrounding starting this blog and then ironically I dove into what I LOVE – writing, cooking and helping others. Voila, my blog was born out of both fear AND love!
I received this awesome quote from a friend. Thank you for sending this, people NEED this reminder, I needed this reminder. Take that leap into the unknown and punch fear right in the face. No such thing as failing, just lessons (thank you to another friend for that amazing reminder). I’m personally working on not overthinking things and just doing (like Nike says – Just Do It). Overthinking is fear-based. When we release that idea of perfection (what is perfection anyway) and Just Do It…then we have replaced Fear with Love. We need to love ourselves enough to know that what we are saying and doing is coming from a place of love and how others receive your message is on THEM. I’m going to repeat that for the folks in the back row…if what we are saying and doing is coming from a place of love, how others receive your message is on THEM.
The biggest take away I’d love for you to have from this post is to learn to love YOU! After all, you are around yourself the most. Sounds silly, but it’s true. It’s not selfish to love yourself or do things for yourself. You know the saying – You can’t pour from an empty cup. Fill up that cup with all the things that bring you pure joy!
And this has zero to do with love or fear. Just sharing that sometimes THIS is dinner. I still made flank steak for my son, but was craving these roll-up’s (turkey, laughing cow cheese and pickled asparagus – don’t knock it ’till you tried it).
I’d love to hear from you – comments, questions, suggestions, I will take it all in. Thank you for your support. Permission to go buy yourself some flowers and one more permission slip this time – permission to spread love and love YOU, just as you are.
So, it’s kind of like when people ask me ‘How did you know it was time for a divorce?’. And I always reply with what a very wise friend said to me one time, ‘You will know. You get hit with feathers of signs and then one day you get hit with a brick’. That is what I feel right now – I got hit by another brick…but in such a magical cool way. I love to write, I love to take photos, I love to help others and I love to meal plan and cook. I need to get my blog off the ground. [As you can see the time I wrote this, is not today’s date. Getting up a blog isn’t as easy as it looks.] I turned 50 this year and got a divorce at 49 (after being together for 30 years). Don’t feel sorry for me, I’m good. Everything happens for a reason. I have two incredible kids that I love watching in this phase of their lives and I’m in a beautiful space.
I’ve been in support groups, I listen to podcasts, read books, and just want to spread joy…help others find joy, even on those days when you have to dig a little deeper. This blog isn’t about my divorce (that’s what my book is for), it’s about living again. I don’t promote divorce, I promote peace – you have to figure it out. It’s about Chapter 2, it’s about truly going after what has been pulling at you for so long, it’s about celebrating being alive. I told someone tonight that I tend to plan and not follow through on things that I want to do, as I’m so afraid to fail (most of us are). Well, if one person subscribes (or however this works) to my blog and they have a better day or feel like a gift to this world, just for one day…then I’ve done what I’ve set out to do. If just one (insert sport here – mine was soccer) Mom/Dad reads this and gets an idea to make meals easier for the week and that helps relieve a little stress…then I will feel accomplished. If one person reads this and they push themselves to do something they’ve always wanted to do…that will feel so dang cool. I’m taking a leap in the hopes that even one of those scenarios comes true.
It is never easy reaching for dreams, but those who reach walk in stardust.
Look, I don’t claim to have all of the answers on how to heal yourself (shoot, I’m still a work in progress), I love to cook (I’m decent at it and it brings me peace) and I love LOVE (leaning into loving my life, my relationships, traveling, my job and myself…all of it, we just need to love a little more). What I want to bring to you is a little perspective on life. Life isn’t always easy, but it certainly is what WE make it. I want to take you on a healing journey with me. I was once asked if I will ever be done listening to podcasts or reading self-help type books and my immediate response, without hesitation, was nope. I always want to be a better version of me, that doesn’t mean I’m not proud of myself…we are all works in progress especially as we travel through all the different seasons of life. I will give you my weekly menu with credit going out to all of the wonderful cooks I follow on TV, Instagram, Facebook, Cookbooks (I have a cookbook obsession). I will give you my insight on what love means to me, share quotes that move me (I have a bit of a quote obsession as well) and leave you with permission to buy yourself flowers (I’m serious).
Life doesn’t have to be fancy, it just needs to be what brings you fulfillment! Tonight, getting this first blog written, with some good tunes in the background…simply made me happy.
