Always Healing

Why did I even create this blog? Well, I realized a year and a half later, I am still healing…shoot, make that 10-20 years later. We are constantly evolving and changing, meeting new people and removing people from our lives. By the way, it’s OK to remove people from your life that do not contribute to your happiness or well-being. To me, it is important to always be on a healing journey. You never know how your words or actions may affect someone else and who may be watching. I encourage you to check on your family and friends. The majority of people are not ‘fine’. People need people. People need to feel loved and that they have a place in this world. Hence, the birth of my blog. In sharing my experiences and perspective, perhaps it will help in someone else’s healing journey…and it sure is helping with my own.

Through my journey, I’ve realized what an over compensator I am. Previously, if someone didn’t like me, I felt it was my mission to win them over. If I wasn’t feeling loved by someone, I would try to love a little harder. I think you get the idea. Please stop doing this. Stop seeking validation in others. As I write this, I too continue to make a concentrated effort not to go down this path. YOU ARE ENOUGH! If you aren’t happy with YOU, then change for YOU and no one else. I do know when you have traumatic experiences in your life that little things could trigger you and set your mind back to those traumatic memories. Dive in and find the tools to help soften that blow of those triggers and be able to pull yourself back into a good space. I’ve probably already said this before, as it is a motto I try to live by – you can have a bad day or two, but do not stay there!

You are enough!

Please have some empathy for those around you. Healing is not linear and is definitely not one size fits all. It’s so incredible to me, the more people I connect with, the more I’ve become aware of the fact that we, as humans, carry a tremendous amount on our shoulders. I told a friend the other day that we have been through things that would break most people. Perhaps you don’t give yourself enough credit for what you have survived. Permission to give yourself a pat on the back – you are HERE and the world is grateful to have you!

As we approach Thanksgiving this week, be mindful that the holidays can be especially tough for some and trigger some unwanted memories. I would love to help to try to assist you in flipping that script. Don’t dwell on the past, if those memories no longer serve you, start a new tradition, make a new memory and make the best of what you have. To those of you that don’t know what it’s like to experience loss or trauma in your life, please know that when you drive down the street or walk through a crowded mall…the majority of people in your presence are dealing with something heavy either presently or in their past. I’m not giving excuses to those that have gone through insurmountable things to act in an unkind manner, I’m just saying that we should go through life a little lighter. Spread a little more love, be more giving to those around you and have a little grace (yourself included).

Again, why did I set out to create this blog? I wanted to raise awareness that it’s OK to not be OK. I want to open the conversation that we all need help in some sort of way. One day, I hope that my words can help pave a path for someone else to live a healthier and stronger life. Please don’t judge people that are in a situation that you think they should remove themselves from. Gaslighting is real. Feeling like you are stuck and alone is real. I lived that life. Listen to people and be there for them, with boundaries, of course. If someone isn’t willing to even explore an option to better themselves, then sometimes you’ve done all you can, and it’s OK to close that door. If you look back on your life or even your present life…do you want someone else to judge how you live your life? There is no such thing as a perfect life (should I repeat that for the folks in the back?). Shoot, I’m throwing my life out there to be judged like crazy and I’m OK with that. If I can help alleviate a little bit of pain for someone else…it’s all worth it. Peace is GOLD…if you are striving for anything, strive for Peace!

Don’t forget to vocalize your gratitude this week. I’m truly grateful that you take the time to read my blog. I am in a space where I’m grateful for my messy journey. Some days, my gratitude lies in the fact that I opened my eyes that morning…and that’s OK! Permission to get yourself some flowers this week – celebrate YOU!